Mmm … Chocolate

Friday: Do you feel that? The temperature’s rising, the days are lengthening. And First Friday is no longer a test of your endurance but a nice way to spend your TGI-time. Lori Hill returns for a guest spot of First Friday Focus. Welcome her back. Then it’s time to decide between two titans of Philly musicalia: On one hand, it’s West Phil-born DJ RJD2. On the other, it’s freak-a-deek rock stars Man Man. Mama knows. Life is hard.

Saturday: Do-do-do right for the bikers of this fine city by getting a turkey (check out that lingo!) at tonight’s Red Bowl Bike Coalition Fundraiser. Or settle in with a book or a flick. Maybe something classic, or a once-classic that’s soon to be forgotten?

Sunday: Let’s hear it for the ladies at today’s Womyns Fest that features the best of all things girly-like. Continue your support for the mammary set when Kathryn Bigelow attempts to becomes the first once woman ever to take home the bald and ball-ess statuette (that’s Oscar, ya dig?) for best director. Cheer her on at the Institutes’s Oscar Pajama Party.

Friday: If it ain’t that time of year where you hold your loved ones a little bit closer and wash all of your problems away with drug store chocolates and oversized stuffed animals. But it don’t matter who you love to Mama Omnibus, whether it be boy, girl, body pillow or simply rock ‘n’ roll, which is why tonight you’ll have the option of checking out either snarling darling Jemina Pearl, local lass Birdie Busch or punk quartet Leather. But fuel up first at the Tell and Show comic art exhibit now up at the Green Line Cafe and featuring CP fave Pete Stathis.

Saturday: The outpouring of love when Philly’s guitar genius Jack Rose had passed was astounding. A.D. Amorosi chronicles it all in this week’s cover story in anticipation of the big tribute happening tonight. Yeah, it’s sold out and all but they’ll release 50 tickets at the door so put on your mittens and get in line. But if you wanna stay warm and snuggly with your cuddle bunny (gag, cough, GAG) then start your Valentine’s early with our round-up of V-Day happenings. Just make sure they don’t include Valentine’s Day.

Sunday: But Mama can’t ignore the day of all days when it’s actually happening, right? Don’t worry your lovely little heads off Omnibussers. Felicia D.’s got some fashionable goings on, especially if you’re looking for Love on Girard (hubba hubba), a neighborhood promo that can get you a buy one, get one 50 percent off tattoo for you and forever love (it better be). Like Mama said in the beginning, I don’t care who, or what you’re loving, even if happens to be a great opening line. Like this one from Josh Middleton’s preview of dance piece The Mentalist (which you’ll be going to tonight): Kate Watson-Wallace — Lady Wa-Wa if you’re nasty.

Sigh!

And to Jam Jam Westside: Smokebomb.

They’re telling us 12-18″ but Mama Omnibus knows better: If Bolaris says a foot, we might get some flurries. So don’t cancel those weekend plans yet, ’cause we got a lot to do.

Friday: Can’t handle the First Friday crowds? The today is the perfect time to journey to Old City … because let’s face it: y’all are pusses when it comes to the white stuff. Chucks conducts the First Friday Focus train. All aboard! If you’re freaking and just want to curl up with a hot cup o’ cocoa, Rocket Cat’s is doing the art thing courtesy of Craftivity.

Saturday: Sure, you can get a tat from Northern Liberties Tattoo anytime, but how often can you get one based off of graffiti artist Steve Powers’ A Love Letter for You (now in book form!). Head out today to get in on the party action for the book release at Exit Skateshop. Since you’re already kind of close (and there’s no reason to trek far in a blizzard), it’s Johnny Brenda’s for you, where Pepi Ginsberg takes the stage.

Sunday: You know where it doesn’t snow? New Orleans. Pretend you’re in NoLa when you Mardi Gras on South Street. But how will you get there? How about you Build Your Own Bike first?

Stay warm, little Omnibussers!

Happy late, B-day, King.

Friday: How do you take your rock and/or roll? You can go the glockenspiel-filled route of Freelance Whales with their twee romantic pop tunes. Or go straight to the classic of all classics with Elvis’ B-day Bash at the Keswick. It’s simply too much.

Saturday: Richard Harris digs death; only a portion of his 1000+ piece collection will be on view at the Slought Foundation’s “Strictly Death: Slected Works from the Richard Harris Collection.” Equally morbid is the assortment of medical movies that make up the Medical Film Symposium. Eeew, gross. But if you really wanna catch a flick that’ll give you the heebies and the jeebies…

Sunday: …Then get yourself to the Ritz for Michael Haneke’s Palm d’Orr-winning The White Ribbon. Afterwards, you’ll need a drink. Trust Mama Omnibus. So who better to tell you how to stock your own bar than our gal Felicia D.?

Don’t block Rebecca Nagle’s box

Friday: Performance artist Rebecca Nagle blows out the box with her newest show A Dozen Thing I Want to Do on Stage, where she’ll tinker with audience-performer dynamics. Similarly, the North Chicago Dance Co. tinkers with dance genres, mixing and matching until they get the perfect combo. Their show begins the dance calendar of the 2nd Season Arts Guide, but movin’ and groovin’ ain’t all. There’s also Rock/Pop, Roots, Classical, Jazz, Visual Art, Theater and Movies calendars. Not to mention A.D.’s crystal ball into Philly’s arty future. Spooky. You can even check out cover outtakes!

Saturday: Mama Omnibus will certainly be one of the ladies out for blood/a good deal at the Sugarhabit Warehouse Sale: Winter Edition. Come and join me … unless we have the same taste in clothes … then you should go to the new farmers’ market starting up at the Piazza. But you’re gonna need to bring your A-game tonight, ’cause Joey’s and his Girls will be looking smokin’. Check out Neal Santos’ vid of the ladies below:

Sunday: Taylor Ho Bynum don’t mean to toot his own horn … but he is the co-curator of the Festival of New Trumpet Philadelphia (rimshot!). If you’re not feeling horny (Oh my sides! The puns! The puns!!), then check out the Wilma’s sharp Becky Shaw, by Law & Order writer Gina Gionfriddo. Dun, dun.

Michael Cera’s alter ego says a have a good weekend, or he’ll smoke your ass.

Friday: The sky isn’t falling, but close. Rock out to duo The Sky Drops tonight at the Khyber. But before that meet cute at Art Star with their Sea Party! exhibit and sale full of plushy animal fun.

Saturday: Mama Omnibus might be telling you to drink up at P.O.P.E. for the stop on the 10 Days of Olde Bartholomew Barleywine tasting tour because I giggle every time someone says firkin but that doesn’t mean the booze won’t taste good. Firkin (heh heh heh) is tapped at noon. Sober up for the Smoke, Lilies & Jade Arts Initiative, which brings attention to health issues in the black and LGBTQ communities.

Sunday: Pick up some new duds at the Hawthorne Yoga Clothing Swap. Even if you just want to get rid of some crap, Hawthorne says they’ll donate it all to the South Philly’s Circle Thrift when all is said and done. Word around the weather vane is that this weekend is going to be cold as balls, so how about a movie? You’ve got Gilliam’s The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus (watch the Trailer!), Daybreakers (read Mama’s interview with Ethan Hawke), Leap Year or Youth in Revolt (read Mama’s interview with Michael Cera).

Thursday: Start your day off early with some bubbly in honor of General Meade’s Birthday. When you’re finished boozing it up in the cemetery, Amorosi breaks down New Years’ Eve events for those who do or don’t got the cash: Burger’n'Booze or Penthouse Party? Pacifiers and Glowsticks? Get the full scoop in this week’s Agenda.

Friday: GET FED! If you’re already out in the streets drunk, watching Mummers strut, fill your belly with some brunch at Silk City. They will be offering their weekend brunch menu, featuring the infamous foie gras scrapple. Or head over to White Dog Cafe for the Pajama Party Brunch. More fine drunken New Years’ eats in this week’s What’s Cooking.

Saturday: If you’re done being a drunkard for the weekend and want to spend time with your family, head over to Walking Fish Theatre in Fishtown for some Family-oriented theatre. But for the rest of you who will continue to drink but wish to retain [some of] your dignity, consider joining the lesbian community at the Stilettos and Champagne event at the Marathon Grill. Those pearls won’t clutch themselves, ladies! A prize is awarded to the sexiest woman in pumps. Later, Hit up Medusa Loungefor HURRAH at night with Lady Prowl and Shawn Ryan.

Sunday: Calm things down and head over to Fishtown for Proximity Gallery’s second annual Neighborhood Group Show. There’s also more arts events to put on your to-do list featured in this weeks’ First Friday Focus. Happy Hangovers!

Friday: Start this pre-X-Mas weekend off with a healthy helping decapitations courtesy for Americanized ninja classic Shogun Assassin at I-House. Then rock out at Dave Sommers Cancer Benefit to help pay the monster medical bills of the former Cloud Minder member. Or you can just go to the Third Annual Dirty Diamond Vagina Jam and be overcome with the great need to take a shower.

Saturday: It’s off to the Troc for the triumphant return of the Big Mess Cabaret. But first get yourself to National Mechanics for the Northern Home Toy Drive or booze it up at Firkins for our Furry Friends or Christmas Beer at the Institute. Or, if like Mama Omnibus, you melt in the snow and are freaked by its impending onslaught, you might want to stay home and cook yourself something delicious.

Sunday: Don’t let Seymour down! Today is your last cance to catch Little Shop of Horrors. Don’t miss it. For the homos and homo-ettes out there, today is your day! Josh Middleton, everyone’s favorite Art Phag, hooks you up with three events in his new column Queer Bait to make your holiday season gay.

Both Naughty and nice

Friday: If none of the DIY goodness of our recent Gift Guide struck your fancy, but you’re still digging the spirit, head to Fishtown for the Rock Bass Rainbow Fest, complete with crafts, bands and everything else that makes Tyler students want to move to F-town. The go bad, real bad, with the help of homo Santa at Naughty.

Saturday: But do Mama’s eyes deceive me? Could it be?! TWO GAY SANTAS?!?!? Head over to Giovanni’s Room where Samuel R. Delaney (who claims to have boinked over 50,000 men) will let you sit on his lap if you help out the ailing gay book stop. Transitioning from gay Santa to the Nutcracker could lend itself to a litany of both terrible and hilarious jokes. But Mama is classy and will not go thereLook, don’t beesmirch my childhood memories. Just go see it.

Sunday: Because Christmas should get in you the giving mood, head to the World Cafe Live for Carry the Fire, a benefit with a full bill of Philly bands to help out the recently shuttered venue. Then round out your holidays-in-full-swing weekend with some grub — or as the French say: grub — with Bistro La Minette’s French Christmas Dinner Menu.

webmd.com

Latke. Drool.

I missed y’all last week Omnibussers, but Mama knew you were too incapacitated by turkey to take your Weekend seriously. So let’s go hard this time, shall we?

We shall.

Friday: My, my, it must be that time of the month ’cause Chucks is giving you the focus on First Friday. Will your art be environmentally friendly or simply fantastical, like Vox Populi’s Aloof Hills by Kara Crombie, who gave Chucks a talking to over on Crit Mass. Speaking of Crit Mass interviews, Mary Armstrong’s got the scoop on Loudon Wainwright III. Good thing he’s playing the Keswick tonight.

Saturday: We’ve been keeping a close watch on the 941 Theater after L&I shut ‘em down in November. But just ’cause they’re down, don’t mean they’re out. The Philly Indie Craft Fair (where Mama got a sweet shirt with a rhino on it last time she went at the 941) will hold a fundraiser for their former homeboys. So go and get some new duds because tonight you’re painting the town funny at the Philly Sketchfest. This ain’t your daddy’s improv. ‘Cause it’s not improv at all.

Sunday: Get your fill of one the best parts of Judaism: the latke. It’s the Latkepalooza time and if you can’t handle the potato, get outta the shul. Since you’ll be stuffed to the gills with the the glory that is the latke, you’re gonna want to take it easy tonight. Mama plans on hitting Up in the Air, but that’s ’cause I’ve already seen Dare (which was filmed right outside Philly). Or I might just pick up a DVD. Who knows?

Friday: Thanksgiving may seem close but it’s actually six excruciatingly far days away. The Down Home Diner gives you your Turkey Day feast early in anticipation of Thursday’s main event. Don’t eat too much, though because you have an entire night of Creepy Puppet films to sit through afterward, featuring — dare we say it?! — a puppet sex tape!!! Or you can dance those extra calories off with Joker and friends at the Mausoleum. There is $2 suggested donation per ticket to save the 941 Theater. Get on it.

Saturday: This week, Kristen Humbert investigated why no one will take donations generated by the Diabolique Fetish Masquerade Ball but that doesn’t mean you can’t hit up yourself and help out with their new cause: Leather Heart, an org that provides emergency funds to fetishists across the land! Why don’t you hit up Cut the Craft and see if there’s any costume options that fit the steampunk theme?

Sunday: Please, let’s not sit here and pretend you don’t read the Harry Potter books, are there opening night for each movie and secretly wish you were a wizard too. So don’t be embarrassed when we see each other at Harry Potter and the Magical Muggle Museum. Then get all Ron and Hermione-ly romantic at Pop Revisited where Aimee Robidoux pieces together a love story, while her partner in crim Peter Andrew Danzig sings forgotten pop songs of the ’90s.

Neal Santos

Friday: Shed a tear for T&P Fine Art, the excellent South Phil cheapo art gallery, who will close their doors after this show. But then pull yourself together, Omnibussers! We have far too much to do. Such as watch Broken Lizard, they of Super Troopers, Beerfest and the upcoming Slammin’ Salmon, do their thing. Or give it up for some kick ass ladies, literally, as the Liberty Belles roller derby team battles for supremacy at the Declaration of Derby. Mama Omnibus has faith that the Belles will wipe the floor with NYC’s Gotham Girls…

Saturday: …but that ain’t the only Philly v. New York action in town. Lorraine Ranalli (yeah!), writer of Gravy Wars: South Philly Foods, Feuds & Attytoods, will take on the Big Apple’s Johnny DeCarlo (boo!) in the World Series Gravy Competition. Sigh, DeCarlo, it’s not even worth it. Now that your appetite is whetted for blood thirsty competition (and you’re already in South Philly), head to The Arena for CZW: Night of Infamy for some wrasslin’ smackdown action.

Sunday: You might as well stay in the neighborhood ’cause next it’s the Found Footage Festival at Connie’s Ric Rac, who are subbing in for the on-hiatus 941 Theater (sad face). Then it’s northward ho for New Zealand punks The Axemen, who share a bill with the totally awesome Times New Viking and The Mad Scene.

Friday: Head over to CP’s neck of the woods for a little First Friday action; Carolyn Huckabay’s got the goods on what to see (we’ve also got some sweet new gallery listings you gotta check out). But art in Old City? Old news. Be bold and try another artistic locale with the Strawberry Mansion Art, Jewelry and Fine Craft Show.

Saturday: Esquire writer A.J. Jacobs wouldn’t miss the First Person Fest for the world, even after he met A.D. (who also rocked this week’s cover story on the Top 10 Spectrum Music Moments). Show up in style by traveling along with the Tweed Ride. It’s a good this thing is happening on today, rather than tomorrow because these riders would most certainly have to start a to-the-death brawl with the participants in the…

Sunday: …Snuggie Crawl. Do not scoff, haters. Mama Omnibus alway, always, always wanted a Snuggie and it wasn’t until Art Department angel Allie bestowed one upon me that I felt my life was complete. Needless to say, it’s glorious. But too many Snuggies and not enough substance leads to trouble so check out Life Without Parole, where excerpts of Mother California: A Story of Redemption Behind Bars by the incarcerated Kenneth Hartman will be read.

Friday: James Spooner and Matthew Morgan’s idea for the Afro-Punk fest came out of their 2003 doc, which is apt because your Mischief Night is going to be movie-themed. In addition to hitting up music/lit/sometimes sports fest, you can check out Lars Von Trier’s Antichrist, which I guarantee will show you more than any Saw movie could hope to do. Or go for the OG of horror, Nosferatu, accompanied by the lovely former covergirl T. Desiree Hines (and had a cameo on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia last night!).

Saturday: Please, like Mama Omnibus even needs to tell you what day today is. Of course, Rodney Anonymous and the Dead Milkmen hold it down tonight at the Troc. Read his pre-show diary. Seriously. It’s beyond hilarious. But don’t forget Holly and Lauren’s suggestions, like Revival Burlesque or the Day of the Dead Festival. Erin’s got some foodie suggestions over on Meal Ticket as well, and Pat’s got Making Time’s Halloween for you over in Music.

Sunday: But Halloween doesn’t have to end when November starts. Josh Middleton has the Name that Tune lowdown in Critical Mass’ Art Phag, not to mention the darker than the darkest dark sounds of Dethklok and Mastodon hitting the Electric Factory (study up by reading A.D. Amorosi’s interview with Dethkok creator Brendon Smalls). Mama gets it if this ghoulish weekend tuckered you out so how about a little Dia de Los Muertos menu from Xochitl.