Binge & Yarn Storytelling

The art of inebriated tale.

by Lauren F. Friedman

Like all the other yarns shared at Bob & Barbara's new drunken storytelling event, this is true: When I was 16 years old, a giant man wearing an animal skin coat and carrying a knotted wooden staff approached me on the street. "I've been sleeping for a hundred years," he said, "and now I'm hungry." He sized me up. "And I'm gonna eat you."

What, no laugh? No problem. When told to a roomful of plastered strangers, the story is suddenly bang-on-the-table hilarious — and therein lies the beauty of Binge & Yarn.

Host Robert E. Brown laid out the simple rules at the beginning of the night: This is not an acoustic open mic, a soapbox or a poetry slam. "Save your bad metaphors for West Philly," he said. Engage, but don't heckle. "Other than that, just tell the story you tell your buddies that kills when you're at a party."

The first storyteller kicked things off with, "Have you ever been so drunk you woke up naked in a room with no furniture and no blinds?" (No, but that's so ... specific.) Not to be outdone, the woman who went next talked mainly about her sister, who is "actually a crack whore." When she proudly claimed that "no one is more white trash than me," nobody protested. Later, someone told a slurred, meandering tale ("Come on, what happened?" yelled some hecklers) that ended with him shooting a "gangster" in the head and promptly silencing the front-row peanut gallery. Done and done.

As the night went on, the stories became increasingly incomprehensible. "Last time, we went until 1:30," says Brown. "By then it was all binge and no yarn."

Every second Tuesday, 10 p.m., free, Bob & Barbara's, 1509 South St., 215-545-4511, snivelinggoat.blogspot.com.