In The Event That...

Booty Jokes Do It For You

by Amanda McKenna

Where does a pirate go for a picnic? Fairmount Parrrrrrrk. (It's only fair to warn you that things get nerdier below.)

In celebration of Sept. 19 as International Talk Like a Pirate Day, the Independence Seaport Museum is providing two days of corny pirate jokes, contests, trivia contests and, of course, lessons on how to talk like a proper pirate.

All the scallywagging will center around the Seaport Starlight Cinema series' final outdoor film screening, The Princess and the Pirate, starring Bob Hope. Strap on yer best boots, bandannas and eye patches because ye mateys with pirate gear on will get into the eve for free; but ye bilge rats who forget yer shipshape britches will owe the cap'n $4 admission. And, if ye thinks yer a seaworthy scumbucket, the crew of the tallship Gazela will be on hand to give tours.

For those crews with wee mates, check out the Seaport on Saturday for some plundering 101. Admission is $5 and will enroll yer li'l seadogs in "Pirate-U."