The Rocky statue is officially situated by the Art Museum steps. They could've just put Kim Catrall up — already a mannequin. Duh. Plus 1

Licenses and Inspections official Nicholas "Satch" Sacerdote resigns while being investigated by both city and federal authorities."At least those hicks from Harrisburg weren't up my ass," says Rick Mariano. Minus 2

House Speaker John Perzel announces plans to put over 1,300 new cops on the streets by 2010. Because new patrol cars will be cut from the budget. Plus 1

District Attorney Lynne Abraham, currently in the process of joining the city's retirement-incentive program, announces that she will not seek reelection in 2009. Election? We thought she was appointed for life by Billy Penn. Minus 3

The parking garage beneath Independence Mall loses power Tuesday morning, trapping a number of drivers in darkness. If only their cars had been equipped with some sort of device that could generate light. Even

Center City District head Paul Levy is confident that the urban housing demand won't dissipate anytime soon. Also reports he's been in a coma for six months. Even

NBC-10's Glenn "Hurricane" Schwartz confirms that he and wife Wynette have been separated for three months. Guess Wynette missed those moustache rides. Minus 1

The high-tech "School of the Future" designed by Microsoft opens in West Philly. "Hello, I'm your principal," says John Hodgman. Plus 2

State Historical and Museum Commission honors city planner Ed Bacon with a historical marker at LOVE Park. "Edmund Hucked Here." Plus 5

Total Pluses: 9
Total Minuses: 6
This Week's Total: 3
Last Week's Total: 8