Pabst Blue Ribbon Philadelphia Rock Paper Scissors

City League Championship Series, various dates, times and locations through June 17, $1, www.rpscityleague.com

"Get some scissors in there!"

"It's all about rock, baby!"

"It's almost insane up here, folks."

These aren't quotes from Motley Crue's The Dirt -- they're things I overheard at Finn McCool's (118 S. 12th St.) during an early installment of the Pabst Blue Ribbon Philadelphia Rock Paper Scissors City League Championship Series.

Rock paper scissors (RPS) is a classic clash of wits. Tournament director Shawn Ring, who refereed Finn's 14 combatants, thinks the universal appeal of RPS lends to its popularity. "It's one of those games that anyone can play," he says. "It's a sport for people who don't like sports."

I sat at the bar to observe the matchups: Two people faced each other on either side of a table and let it fly while Ring provided humorous commentary. Competitors ranged from a young blonde named Lauren to "Skipdog," a Locust Bar employee who had just learned to play RPS earlier that day. Skip told me he liked scissors best "because it's easy." Word.

RPS success takes more than just luck. Seasoned players employ numerous attacks, including "The Avalanche" (three rocks in a row), "The Bureaucrat" (three papers) and "The Toolbox" (three scissors). South Philly competitor Adam Ellender loves the 'Lanche. "Good ol' rock," he says. "Scissors is too risky, and paper—who throws paper?"

The two-month league season consists of competitions at bars around the city. For just $1, participants can compete to earn points. The top 64 scorers are then invited to compete for the championship, which carries a $1,000 purse.

The big winner at McCool's was Safian and Rudolph jeweler Rich Goldberg, who believes the key to winning an RPS match resides in the mind. "It has to do with digging into the psyche of your opponent," he says. "In due time, people will learn not to underestimate my game."