Stallone in the Italian Market, eyes glazed over, staring at giant mozzi balls, ears ringing from the din of "yo"; at'sa nize. It's familiar having a wee Rocky around. But as a scrunched-faced Sly trolls lower-case bars (Irish Pub, Liberties: how downmarket) with goofball brother Frank for Balboa, you wonder: Does he wake in fear? Sweating hard the notion of a failure that would bring him back to this? I mean, if he'd fucked up Rambo, it's not like he'd've been shipped off to the jungle. But if this final Rocky dies, well, they say that housing bubble's gonna burst soon, Sly. … They're ooky 'n' spooky, freaky 'n' folky and they're on Drag City now. "We just signed Espers—more Philly blood on DC," shouts Drag City's Zach Cowie, who also brought ze local Pearls & Brass to the label. Find Zach and kiss him at the Khyber's Gary Higgins/Espers/ Randall of Nazareth (from Pearls) show, Nov. 19. … Yes, the long-awaited sexed-up couples club Pleasure Garden is opening its doors within the week. But on the verge of Club Kama Sutra's fifth anniversary, comes a note from owner Al Tizer that his secret off-South space got snagged by L&I last Saturday. "They cited us for alleged violations, and ordered us to close," read Tizer's note. "We intend to fight for our right to open and operate. … As always, our top priority is to maintain the integrity of the club and protect everyone's privacy." 'Preciated, Al. Much 'preciated. … See that ish of Rolling Stone with Green Day on the cover? The back page finds Mike Hoffman—after last Friday's soiree celebrating 30 years of Horses-dom a la Patti Smith—reporting AKA Records sales: scads of Fall and Steve Reich sold. Woof! … Listen my Kraut Mick friend: Who's Tom Hagen and what's he doing with a chocolate-colored saloon with rock vibes hawking Brandy Alexanders? He's the namesake of Tom Hagen's Tavern, the 19th and Arch-er holding its three-day opening (Nov. 17-19) starring the Bawdy Girls, Town Jewelers, Soul Travelers, the Carmen Martella III b-day bash and moi. "It's classic neighborhoody atmosphere," says Rich Podulka, part of the management team you know from North, of his fireplace-lined Tavern. "Nothing lounge-y about it." … Abilene comic/host Danny Ozark helps out the Franklin's Paine Skate Park Fund Nov. 17 at North Star with Ready to Rip roaring. Love the alliteration. … WHOWHATWHERE: Duane Hopwood star David Schwimmer dropped in on Body Worlds at the Franklin Institute after hitting the Continental Midtown the night previous. The former Friends star neither kvetched nor splashed in any fountains. Three days in A.C. and Bobby Brown (reportedly boozed up before and during his House of Blues show and its TSOP-filled after-party) hit the Tropicana's Quarter hard while shooting a next season of Being Bobby Brown. Glug. Ask King Britt what he's up to at his birfday at World Café Live after the show, and you get a list: remixing "For the Love of Money" for a Gamble and Huff record as well as doing likewise for The Doors and Dizzy Gillespie. Meanwhile, Britt's opening act, Ursula Rucker, drops Ma' at Mama when 2006 starts. Spied: Ed Rendell popping out of a Dunkin' Donuts around 16th Street. Gotta respect a governor who carries out his own doughnuts. … Not only will Russell Brand be bringing Grace Park pal Ian Thomas to his Notebook perf-comedy cabaret at Bar Noir Nov. 21. He'll host Hospital X's Xavier Becerra and Ice Water Scandal's Andrea Hansen and their new avant-project Painting Soliders. Whyzzisweird? The A's Richard Bush is producing the duo's dark debut at his studio. … After their auspicious debut of the Kimmel/Katrina benefit, Dice Raw's funkpunk Disease open for The Roots at Villanova Nov. 20. … The last Making Time of 2005? With the fussy live Euro-pop of Sweden's Love Is All (dig "Talk Talk Talk") and the mop-haired stylings of Gregg "Not Dead Yet" Foreman? Yes, Dave P, Julian P and company end it all at Transit Nov. 19. You want this. … Worth his salt: Taylor Barnebey, the Meritage owner no longer partnered with James Collabelli at the 'tage, took over ye old Salt at 20th and Rittenhouse for a BYOB entitled Out of the Blue. … Dave Doughman and Joseph Siwinski. They are Swearing at Motorists. They have finished their first CD in four years, Last Night Becomes This Morning. It is a hard and frightening album. And you will buy it in February from Secretly Canadian. Do you understand? … It is law: Along with wishing beee-u-tiful b-days to Wang Newton and Tony Sparacino's Lucky Lounge (Nov. 18, Lula's) we must kissyface Plain Parade's Sara Sherr and Maria Tessa Sciarrino for going into year three with the bang of its Philly-covers-Philly compilation, Songs from the Sixth Borough (we're very enthused by Rifle Nice covering the Action News theme) and its Tritone listening party Nov. 19. Another kiss.