Mayor Street offers to house 1,000 hurricane-displaced families in Philadelphia. Some friendly advice: Our helicopters aren't here to help.
Plus 10

First wave of Philly-bound Katrina evacuees fails to show up, saying they don't want to move again. OK, but if we find out you guys actually end up in Phoenix, we're cutting you off.
Minus 2

Sun King wins Philadelphia Derby. Meanwhile, Smarty Jones sticks it to another couple of Kentucky mares.
Plus 1

Many condo owners hit with fat property-tax increases. Yeah, hurricane victims, come on in! Hope you can afford us!
Minus 1

On Labor Day, hundreds of union workers march down Columbus Boulevard. That is, after all, the shortest route between Delilah's Den and the Show & Tel.
Even

Trolleys return to Girard Avenue. It's like the fucking Speedline from Port Fishington to Powelton Lemontua.
Plus 2

Students displaced by Katrina welcomed by Villanova, St. Joe's and Penn. For whom the 2005-2006 academic year will heretofore be known as "The Inaugural Year of Diversity."
Plus 7

Philly's amphibious tourist vehicles dispatched in New Orleans relief effort. Awesome, a shelter full of people with Crazy Quackers. Thanks, Ride the Ducks!
Plus 5

Total pluses: 25
Total minuses: 3
This week's total: 22
Last week's total: -1