Man, why'd they print the instructions so small? I can't read all that. Besides, I don't need no rules to check out this little green box with the words "Stoner Trivia" wrapped around an illustrated marijuana leaf. Pretty cool assignment, huh?

The wife wanted to see what was going on, well, before she got distracted by mortgage calculations. I'm sure there's a bunch of ways to play. Like with a group, à la Trivial Pursuit but without all those cool colored pies. But for now, it's just me and a box of 350 trivia questions, trying to figure out whether this game's worth recommending.

The categories are pretty funny. "Unjust Bust." "Paraphernalia." Nice.

I'm just going to grab 10 cards and see how I do in this new game brought to you by the fine people at Roverland Games in Langhorne. They're local. Sweet.

Hasheesh? Funny word. Haven't heard that one in a while. But I've never heard of The Hasheesh Eater, so how would I know whether the book was published in 1789, 1857 or 1918? OK, 1857 looks good. Damn, didn't realize the answer was on the same side of the card until my eyes wandered down there before I even saw 1918 was an option. C'mon, I guessed 1857 before I saw it was the answer. Seriously. One for one.

(Note to those who might shell out $19.99 for the game on www.stonertrivia.com: If you're going to play solo, be sure to cover up the bottom of the card with your thumb before you start reading the question.)

OK, music question: What song contains the lyrics "You know I smoked a lot of grass, oh Lord, I popped a lot of pills?" Hmm, Johnny Cash? "Folsom Prison Blues"? Yeah, "Folsom Prison Blues." Survey says big red "X." "The Pusher"? What's "The Pusher"? Next card.

Busted Card: Lose a Turn. Huh? What did I do, officer? Screw it, I'm still answering 10 questions.

C'mon, that one's easy — Afroman.

Man, I hate McCartney, even if "Got to Get You Into My Life" was an "ode to marijuana."

So, 4:20 isn't the police code for a marijuana bust in California? Damn. I'm two for five.

Now you're talking: Taxi rocked. Christopher Lloyd Hmm, he wasn't Latka Gravas. That was Kaufman. Wasn't that dude from Sideways in the movie about him? Yeah, he was Pig Vomit in Private Parts too Wait, it was Jim. Jim! Like my old college roommate who put "Red Nut" up for his name when we went bowling. That was hilarious when he'd roll three strikes in a row, and Red Nut would flash on the overhead TV monitor with a turkey graphic. Rev. Jim Ignatowski? Ha! Woulda never come up with that. I'll take one-third of a point, though. Nobody's watching.

Johnny Depp as Hunter S. Thompson? Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, easy.

Happy Toking Card! Nice, that illustrated dude looks funny. I sure could use a Jaeger.

You gotta be shitting me: Wasn't I just thinking about Private Parts? As in, the movie in which "Howard Stern get[s] a little paranoid after smoking some pot at his parents house." Four-and-a-third out of eight!

Fill-in-the-blank: Weed's often referred to as a _______ drug. Um, hippie? No, gateway. That's it.

Sweet, I'm over .500. Last question: Unjust Bust category: What LSD guru was arrested for marijuana possession and sentenced to 30 years in the 1970s? Oh, man. Not a clue. Timothy Leary? No, wait, Abbie Hoffman. Lift the finger off the answer. Timothy O'Leary. Damn. No wait, hold on: Who's Timothy O'Leary? Wasn't it Leary?!?

I should try playing this with a group, like Trivial Pursuit. It's a pretty cool time. Maybe I should read the rules. Man, those instructions are so small. Ah, who cares? Spiderman 2 is on. Doc Ock, now those are some cool effects. Ha, that editor at the Daily Bugle, funny stuff, reminds me of my boss. But why did he pronounce "planetarium" with the "t"? Wait, don't I have Southpark on the DVR? Ooh, I still have some Jaeger left, don't I?