January 27-February 2, 2005

the bell curve

The Bell Curve

City Paper's weekly gauge of Philly's Quality of Life

Eagles headed to the Super Bowl after beating the Falcons in the NFC Championship Game.
Plus 10

Local hip-hop group VIP is threatened with a lawsuit because its logo is similar to Van Halen's. Is anybody really confused? One band is famous for sucking backstage and the other does it right out there in front of everybody.
Minus 2

Though the Linc was cleared for Sunday's Eagles game, city officials say just 9 percent of residential streets were plowed four days after snow storm. Other sources report that most of the city was plowed that night.
Minus 4

Water Department now says it will only raise rates 12.7 percent instead of 15.5 percent. "The road salt aftertaste is completely coincidental," says PWD spokesman.
Plus 1

Plans for a six-story parking garage on Rittenhouse Square are squashed. Pity party at Quiznos.
Plus 1

Mayor Street retroactively takes three years of cost-of-living adjustments and raises his own salary. "Um, go Eagles?" says Street.
Minus 1

ABC says its original plan for its controversial Monday Night Football promo included John Madden, not Terrell Owens. And in the original script, Nicolette Sheridan's role was played by a Turducken.
Even

Thanks to budget cuts, 20 city libraries go to half days. Which reminds us, who ate the book czar?
Minus 1

City covertly makes plans for Super Bowl parade. Shhhhh! Nobody tell the goddamn Mummers.
Even

Total pluses: 12
Total minuses: 8
This week's total: 4
Last week's total: 9

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