how they'll lose

NFC Divisional Round vs. Minnesota

by Brian Hickey

(Season record: 3-13)

I'm not one to make excuses, so I won't blame last week's disastrous Seahawks victory pick on anything but stupidity. That said, I'm not above using it as a means to slide a personal plug into the paper.

When I predicted Seattle would drop the Rams to the tune of 24-16, and then the Eagles 17-12, I was sitting in the solarium on the ninth floor of Cooper University Hospital, a day before my mom went in for brain surgery. She pulled through thanks to the excellent work of Drs. Warren Goldman, Darren Jacobs and Jamie MacNutt, and the personal care of the nurses on the ninth, including Paige. (If I missed anybody, my apologies.) So, on behalf of my entire family, thanks all; your hard work couldn't be more appreciated.

Now, on to the playoffs. And good God almighty, let's get over Randy Moss' ass already. (Unless, of course, you're willing to admit the overlooked truth that he wasn't mooning the Packers' faithful as much as trying to use their goalpost cushion as toilet paper.)

I'll make this short and sweet: The Eagles D will put up a heck of a fight. Hell, they might even turn a Daunte Culpepper fumble or interception into a touchdown or two. (My guess is Lito and B. Dawk.) But without T.O., the Vikings' fair-to-middlin' D will be able to key on McNabb and Westbrook, and without a consistent escape hatch other than the banged-up L.J. Smith, the offense will be off-balance all afternoon.

And here's how it'll all end: They'll be down four with less than two minutes to go. Donovan will use his legs to keep a desperate drive alive. On fourth and 7 from around the Vikes' 30, he'll throw to Freddie Mitchell, whose nickname will change from "First Down" Freddie to "Why Did He Break Off His Route and Give Up a Season-Ending Interception" Freddie.

Final Score: Vikings 27, Eagles 23.