The Bell Curve

City Paper's weekly gauge of Philly's Quality of Life

Former Eagle Reggie White dies at age 43.
Minus 10

Snowstorm in the Midwest strands thousands at Philly airport. Impromptu poll reveals Philly is definitely not more fun when you sleep over.
Minus 6

Thousands of US Airways passengers find their luggage stranded at Philadelphia International Airport over holiday weekend. "This is, um, a good time," says US Airways spokesman, "to, uh, remember how Christmas is not about, er, material possessions. Maybe?"
Minus 4

New program will reward Northwest Philly residents for having heavy loads of materials to recycle. "Like we need another reason to drink brandy," say highfalutin Chestnut Hill socialites while undertipping at CinCin.
Plus 1

Mayor Street's North Philly neighborhood comes under fire for being one of two city areas with twice-weekly trash collection. "What can I say," Street responds. "I'm just dirty."
Minus 2

Managing Director Philip Goldsmith announces his resignation. And his Schadenfreude.
Minus 1

Police arrest so-called "burqa bandits," two thieves who tried to disguise themselves as Muslim women. Says detective, "Turns out they were just frumpy ninjas."
Plus 3

Daily News columnist Jill Porter writes about accidentally driving away from a gas station with the pump still connected to her car. Next week, she'll write about accidentally knocking over a liquor store.
Plus 1

After million-dollar marijuana bust, Commissioner Sylvester Johnson says the police department has an emphasis on "quality" drug arrests. "And we confiscated some quality shit tonight," he says through a cloud of smoke.
Plus 6

Total pluses: 11
Total minuses: 23
This week's total: -12
Last week's total: 0