This week, think fast. Like now. The Wilma Theater is holding auditions on July 24 for an extended (ba-da-bing) tour of Puppetry of the Penis. Run. Well, if you’re that big, slowly trot. That said, welcome Rodney Whittenberg (first VP), John Robertson (secretary/treasurer) and re-elected president Helen Bruner to their posts at Philly’s Recording Academy. More top Academy newbies: Musiq, Michael Tozzi, Grape St.’s Joe Cahill, Larry Gold, James Elam IV and Nancy Falkow, who’s currently trying to title her book on DIY PR in the music biz. Her first idea, courtesy of Scot Sax? Make Your 15 Minutes Last a Lifetime. (He would name it that.) Send a great idea to nancy@indrestudios.com. That studio, by the way, has recently played host to Joan Armatrading, G. Love, Chuck Treece and Cordalene (who have a track on the Warped Tour CD).… Also in new-job land: Oliver St. Clair Franklin is now president/CEO of International House, comedian Kimberly Cambra is now "Dir. de Operations" for The Delegates’ Restaurant at the National Constitution Center (run by Max & Me Catering) and Kevon Glickman left RuffNation for Jacobs Law Group, where he will represent artists and athletes for Jacobs’ startups, Respect Management and Predator Records.… Lurid lineup of the week: Cyoni Dahling brings DJ Satoshi Tomie to Transit, July 26, till 6 a.m.… Yay. After promising since 2001, ex-Rittenhouse Hotel executive chef Jim Coleman has finally opened Coleman’s Restaurant at Normandy Farm in Blue Bell, featuring locally grown yummy stuff.… Look for the Drexel U label: Check out an article on the launch of Jonathan Estrin’s MAD Dragon record imprint at www.grammy.com.… Stephen Starr’s Mexican spot on 13th Street will be called El Vez.… DENIM hosts a "Bikini Beach Bash" with DJ Jazzy Jeff July 24. Ask for a dee-lish platinum cosmo.… Respect to my fave Cuban rum joints Libre and Alma, but mojitos are tired. So’s "electroclash," according to "founder" Larry Tee, who ended his Luxx gig in Williamsburg on Saturday. Philly DJs, take note.… CBS TV 3’s Beverly Williams is set to debut her as-yet-untitled Sunday morning show on Sept. 7, and recently named Suzanne Hansberry as a producer.… DJ Soul One takes over Hard Rock Cafe on Fridays, turning the joint from Journey to Jay-Z. Speaking of H.O.V.A., he was with Philly’s Beanie Sigel when the Bean got denied bail by a federal judge on charges of felony possession of a firearm (he was arrested in April). He may be out in time for his State Property’s second CD, due in August.… WhoWhatWhere: Joe Pesci crooned with organist Joey DeFrancesco atta Vincent’s Café way uppa inna West Chester. Gwen Gioia and Helene Eksterowicz of The Bachelor hit 32º with Flyers Simon Gagne and Donald Brashear. My So-Called Life guy Wilson Cruz stopped by TLA’s gay film fest premiere of Party Monster at the Prince. Philly expats Sara Marcus (Persons) and Alice Cohen (The Vels) played Doc Watson’s as The Long Lost, an NYC punk Andrews Sisters. Tenacious D’s Kyle Gas hits The North Star July 24 as Trainwreck.… Before anyone tries to dis me: The Hilton sisters -- who did indeed make reservations at DENIM and Bar Noir -- bagged last second.… Y100 and Electric Factory Concerts/Clear Channel hosted a packed "Big Break" show at TLA, where four bands -- Stiffed, Arms of Orion, Riding Bikes and my new fave, the quirky Swell to Great (featuring two pump-organ repair-persons from Lancaster!) -- vied for a spot at July 27’s Lollapalooza at Tweeter. The winner: West Chester’s gangly, pop-hardcore-ish Orion.… While ex-Wharton professor Duane Ball’s hand-carved wood-and-granite bar from the Palladium sold to Liquid Blue, Jon Travis’ hand-built bar (made with wood taken from an old church) at Dobbs/Pontiac is gone, trashed during Pontiac’s remodeling. Speaking of Dobbs, its original Jam Band -- Michael Radcliffe, Greg Davis, Wally Smith and producer George Manney -- is recording a new CD and digging through VHS tapes of past shows for a possible DVD.… Speaking of video, Carl Michaels wants to shoot you, July 25, at 10:30 p.m. at Silk City as Phillysoulcollective/Philadelphia Experiment present East Coast Boogiemen (Ken Christensen and Juan Zapata).… Just when Paul Downing thought he’d be the only game in Trenton (having bought Conduit), Perry’s Nightclub 14 (1002 Olden Ave.) opened up, with Capital City Concerts booking music.… Shawn Slimm and Saigon Slimm welcome original SS vocalist Leslie Sanazaro and key-kid Michael Kordish (of Cee Knowledge).… Rock over to Chinatown: Chef/restaurateur Joseph Poon hosts "The Wok & Walk Tour" July 28. Call 215-928-9333 to get in.… Happy b-day to Opus 251’s Bryan Marton, who commences Thursday and Friday "Rittenhouse Retro" nights in 251’s garden July 24-25 with DJ Camus. More birthday wishes to photographer Lorraine Daly, The Troc’s Jon Hampton, club promoters and DJs Rob Norton, Dominic Angelucci, Tom Colontonio and Jeff Kellmer and to he who puts the "ree" in PaperStreet, Tommy Up.