Short Cut

How to succeed in DJing without really trying.

by Sean O’Neal

The idea of being able to showcase your personal taste in music in front of large amounts of people is always exhilarating. But it’s tough going if you’re too intimidated by the techniques and technology to actually learn how to “mix.” Wouldn’t it be great if you could learn how to do it all while drinking a beer and sitting on your couch at home? Well, now you can! Ahem.

Made in the U.K. (and somewhat aimed towards the aspiring U.K. DJs), the humdrum DJ's Complete Guide: All You Need To Know About The World Of DJing DVD is set up sort of like a British infomercial -- hosted by a cute, blonde, DJ-ignorant bimbo. The Guide discusses the parts and purposes of the turntables, mixer and needles, gives advice on what equipment is most suitable for you and how to set it up, shows you different mixing styles ranging from beat-matching to scratching, how to twist an EQ knob, and offers (somewhat obvious) suggestions on how to get your first gigs and become famous (which, according to them, is to hire an agency; hmm, not quite realistic -- in this country anyway).

The focus is mostly on house/progressive house and a touch of hip-hop when discussing the art of scratching. Drum and bass/jungle is never mentioned or heard throughout the entire 90 minutes. That is, it's all geared for the mindset of a big-club, commercial-style DJ. Artists you've likely never heard of drop science for your inquiring mind -- like Sarah Coombs, Miles Batty, Tazz, Rachel Harvey and Miss Behavin'. Generally, it's an idiot's guide to DJing for the true idiot. Now go get crackin' at this whole DJ thing before everyone else beats you to it! Get it? I said, "beats you to it!" Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! I'm funny.