Had the spiritually transcendent Vanilla Ice vehicle Cool as Ice been released in the summer of 1991, rather than in the autumn, there’s no doubt that it would have gone on to be the highest-grossing film of all time instead of ceding that coveted title to Grown Ups 3: My Proctologist, My Twin, My Lover. This is because, during the dog days, we instinctually seek to retreat to a cool, dark place: And what could possibly be cooler or darker than an air-conditioned movie theater plastered with images of Mr. Robert Van Winkle?
It’s the same reason why, during the recent heat wave that killed your proctologist twin, you purchased The Klinik’s Eat Your Heart Out. Seriously. Look at that cover. What could be darker? What could be cooler? Who needs central air when they’ve got The Klinik, right?
Well, yes and no. While Eat Your Heart Out is ess-entially devoid of any real barn-burners (or whatever passes for a barn in Belgium), this is still quite a son-ically engaging work. Wonderful minimalist synth sounds bubble just under the surface as electronic beats knit the pieces together. This is best exemplified on the track “In Your Room,” which sounds basically like what would happen if The Normal collided with Suicide Commando. It won’t grab you right off the bat, but it will, eventually, grab you.
Despite the occasional miss, Eat Your Heart Out still manages to deliver a chilly dose of noisy, suppressed angst into another summer tragically devoid of a Vanilla Ice blockbuster. B kool stay n skool.
Red Fang/Cancer Bats
Come Monday night, things are about to get pretty effing loud north of Chinatown. Portland,...
Polar Bear Club
Jimmy Stadt’s voice has changed, but it might not be his fault. A bunch of folks have been left...
Brooklyn up-and-comers Lucius put a lot of effort into their appearance. The band’s blond...